Well, I kind of suck!

Apparently I’m not good at this blogging thing. Pfft!

I’ve still been eating well and exercising frequently to try and get this extra weight off. It’s a lot harder then it was a few years ago. I’ve also come to the conclusion that my medication is somewhat to blame for this. I haven’t been eating like a pig and sleeping every hour of the day, so there is really no reason why I gained an extra 20 pounds! …I’ll keep telling myself that anyways.

I can’t wait for the summer to start!!! The weather is getting warm and Chris and I have been spending time outside – going for walks and talking the dogs to the dog park. It’s been rainy and gloomy during the week, so Chris can’t work. Instead he plays video games and watches TV all day. I’m a little jealous.

One of my good friends is going to have her baby soon! I’m so excited! I haven’t really seen her in awhile, but I still feel like we’re very close. Every since she started dating her boyfriend we haven’t seen very much of each other. They live together, so they spend a lot of time together and then she’ll hang out with him and his friends because he wants to hang out with other people. I took it personally for awhile, but then I got over it. It just is what it is. You can’t stay best of friends with someone forever, right? I mean, there are ups and downs, as with anything else. I’m hoping once she has the baby we’ll be spending more time together. I can go over and help her with the baby, and if her boyfriend goes back to work out of town I’ll be seeing her a lot more often I’m sure.

Good friends are hard to come by these days. It’s not as easy to find them, that’s for sure. It was so much easier when I was in high school to just meet people and create that kind of bond. With work I don’t really chit chat with the other ladies in my office because we’re all doing our own work. It’s also harder as I get older because more people are getting married and having babies. A lot of the time I hear “I have to check with my husband first…” before committing to going out. It’s getting pretty exhausting. Maybe I should put an ad out on craigslist. FRIEND WANTED: Must like country music and wine. The end.

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Crayons & Colouring Books

Being an adult sucks sometimes.
Don’t get me wrong, I like working hard for what I have, and living on my own (I will be again soon anyways), and going grocery shopping, and work is awesome sometimes…but there are times when I just want to scream, and then go in the corner and play with Barbie’s.
There never seems to be enough money to go around. There’s money for rent, groceries, utilities, entertainment, gifts, medical expenses, donations, savings, etc … it never ends! It always seems to come at once too. My boyfriend and I found an apartment we want to rent, so we need to buy a couch, and a washer and dryer. I’m also in my sister’s wedding, so I need to pay for my bridesmaid dress. I got a new prescription for my glasses, so I need to buy those. Argh!
Don’t even get me started on the panic that starts to set in when you’re not married or planning on having kids soon. I was the type of teenager who planned my future (BIG mistake). I wanted to be married by the time I was 20(ish) and have babies by the time I was 25. Then I turned 22 and wasn’t close, so I changed it married by 25 and kids by 28. Now I’m 26 and starting to panic. I know people tell me all the time that I’m still young and I have my whole life ahead of me still, and I should travel and be worry free for as long as I can – but I’m one of those ladies that was meant to be a mom. I want kids. I want lots of kids. I want to be a mom. I feel like I had such amazing examples of what parents should be and now I want to be that. I spent so much time with my Nonna when I was younger and I saw how much she loved her kids and grandkids and I want that for myself. I don’t want to wait until I’m 35 to have kids and then only be able to have 1 or 2. I want the sky to be the limit. I want to fill my life with love.
I know, I know …. slow the hell down.
I’m starting to learn to have patience. I’m taking steps day by day to make sure I don’t rush things because if it wasn’t mean to be it’ll just backfire in my face anyways and that will be horrible. My boyfriend and I have talked about potentially being together “forever” and if we both wanted to get married and have children. We seem to be on the same page, but he likes to worry and doubt his feelings, whereas I just take a leap of faith. I can’t push him to do things he’s not ready for, but he can’t also expect me to wait forever, right? It’s just a hard debate.
All in good time ….

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